(World News)– Flanked by family and supporters, self-proclaimed Satanist Marvin Sotelo stood in front of Cal State Long Beach on Thursday morning, touted his political science skills, criticized his incumbent opponent, and made official his 2016 run for the United States House of Representatives.
“Let my experience work for you,” said the 28-year-old Sotelo, who according to the East Los Angeles Sheriff’s Department is a well known gang member called “Knife” and is no stranger to being on the wrong side of the law but that still didn’t stop the ex-con from getting legal recognition from the State of California and the Federal government of the United States by becoming an ordained minister of the Universal Life Church Ministries (U.L.C.M.). “It’s time for a someone who will force their way to a seat at the table.” Sotelo becomes the first official Grassroots Party challenger for 2016 to Rep. Lucille Roybal-Allard (D–Los Angeles), who is expected to seek yet another term in Congress next year. The 74-year-old Allard captured her seat in 2012, winning 58 percent of the vote en route to toppling incumbent Republican Ed Royce. Allard in subsequent elections fended off challenges by David Sanchez (58 percent to 41 percent) in 2012. Sanchez said Tuesday he is several months from deciding if he will try again in 2016. Sotelo said he believes he can succeed where past Allard challengers have failed.
I am a Democrat who thinks rationally and independently, I believe in this country’s Founders’ vision of an essential, but limited, central government that trusts in and promotes the unlimited potential of the American people, while protecting its citizens from threats and suffering both at home and abroad. As your elected representative I will not forget I am elected to govern practically: to make things work, to compromise where necessary, and to serve those for whom I speak. The recent shutdown of the federal government demonstrates the absolute worst aspects of zero-sum political game-playing. Many in Washington have forgotten that they are a body of public servants of a government by the people and for the people, not a self-serving and controlling instrument of elitist power. My agenda is as follows:
GENERATING NEW JOBS
- Effective research towards energy efficiency policies. Developing environmental rejuvenation through renewable energy and water management. Support Pro-Growth Economic Policies.
- Creating investment in water desalinization and alternativeenergy and critical infrastructure. Combined with a responsible energy conservation research and development plan.
ACHIEVE RESPONSIBLE CUTS IN FEDERAL SPENDING, WHILE MAXIMIZING PRODUCTIVITY
- Promote fiscal responsibility by promoting transparency and reductions in government spending by cutting the pay of all Politicians in half and as an act of good faith I will take a three quarters pay cut to show that I am a Congressman for the people and by the people not corporations and private enterprises.
- Reshape government contract transparency and further government accountability through my proposed enhancements to contract cost estimation and excecution. Furthermore, all Federal employees will no longer be exempt from contributing to Social Security.
STRENGTHEN CALIFORNIA COMMUNITIES WITH PUBLIC SERVICE & EDUCATIONAL EFFORTS
- The Satanic Temple started the PROTECT CHILDREN PROJECT®, a community based group propelled organization that offers First Amendment protection to support children who may be at risk for being subjected to mental or physical abuse in school by teachers and administrators through the use of solitary confinement, restraints, and corporal punishment.
- This initiative addresses specific needs offering no cost opportunity to those who need a step in the right direction and will also ensure that the federally funded education systems are affordable for all ages of students and become the best in the world.
- To lead the way, I will review and repeal sanctions onreligions. Mormons will have the legal right to be polygamists, as well as Muslims and any other religion that allows it. The use of Sacraments of all religions shall be protected by federal law this includes Wine, Hashish, Marijuana, Salvia Divinorum, Peyote as well as many others.
IMPROVE U.S. COMPETITIVENESS IN TECHNOLOGICAL DEVELOPMENT
- By centering on advancements in Science, Technology, Engineering, and affordable and an efficient Healthcare system for all American citizens.
- Enforce punishments against those who steal information and proprietary innovation (Combat Cybercrime, Government Spying & Torture, Hacktivism, etc.), your private life should be private and the government’s actions should be public. It’s how this nation was founded. When the government does things in secret, it’s probably committing a crime. When a whistleblower gets sent to prison while the criminals are not punished, our nation loses an important piece of itself.
In ending I’d like to say I am just as corrupt as Andrew Jackson Hinshaw was when he ran for Congress of my district but from a legal point of view “I guess you could say Hinshaw was right.” Please don’t let my rough beginnings blind you from making this country a better place for all American Citizens. I want to serve as your voice in Washington, D.C. and as America’s conduit on Capitol Hill. Let my experience work for you, I have the drive, and I have the necessary skills that will enable me to deliver vibrant innovation in Congress, to California, and to our country.
Vote for Marvin Sotelo on June 7th, 2016, and then continue being awesome.
Thank you for your time.
Rev. Marvin “Knife” Sotelo
Ambassador of the Sinagogue of Satan
Others dismissed the candidacy as a publicity stunt, or a harmless diversion as in the case with the church he’s also affiliated with called “The Satanic Temple” but this district is ready for a change,” Sotelo said. “They’re ready for a common man. They’re ready to start fresh and new… We have huge problems that we’re willing and ready to face.”
The press spent the last week pontificating on Sotelo’s age and insinuating he’s too young and just “don’t give a f***” for the congressional seat. The political scientist is currently 28. The age requirements for the House of Representatives is at least 25, and yet Saira Blair was 17 when she won a state congressional seat. But those are inconvenient details I suppose. Maybe it’s time America had a congressman who could kick butt in a freestyle rap battle…